We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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