Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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