your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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