no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize