She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
PANTIES FOUND
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