Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
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We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
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Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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