I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize