Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
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I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
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Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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