tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
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She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
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This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize