I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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