well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
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I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
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Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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