Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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