I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
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You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
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Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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