its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Randomize