Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize