the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize