This girl is more easily done than said...
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize