meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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