I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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