It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
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I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
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I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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