roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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