Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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