haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
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I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
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I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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