but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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