If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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