he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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