Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
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He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
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I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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