I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize