I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize