best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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