WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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