I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Randomize