That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
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woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
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There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize