We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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