At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
we made out on top of his cat.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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