Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Randomize