did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
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It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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