I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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