Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone

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  (949): Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone http://tfl.nu/p93a
  Replies (11) Good night (2475) Bad night (460) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.

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  (605): I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota. http://tfl.nu/u34o
  Replies (36) Good night (3214) Bad night (510) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  His pubic hair was longer than his dick

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  (636): His pubic hair was longer than his dick http://tfl.nu/f6nh
  Replies (69) Good night (1150) Bad night (26604) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.

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  (505): judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too. http://tfl.nu/lecl
  Replies (5) Good night (2921) Bad night (603) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday

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  (307): Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday http://tfl.nu/9dt4
  Replies (14) Good night (4181) Bad night (931) Order T-Shirt
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.

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  (807): at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket. http://tfl.nu/odip
  Replies (8) Good night (4973) Bad night (1370) Order T-Shirt
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!

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  (352): Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?! http://tfl.nu/wryd
  Replies (11) Good night (2319) Bad night (651) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night

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  (608): Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night http://tfl.nu/2p0f
  Replies (1) Good night (1281) Bad night (581)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?

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  (414): Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table? http://tfl.nu/liu6
  Replies (7) Good night (2251) Bad night (803) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.

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  (503): I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight. http://tfl.nu/rrui
  Replies (8) Good night (2602) Bad night (614)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Technically my penis started a fight tonight

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  (920): Technically my penis started a fight tonight http://tfl.nu/2ets
  Replies (13) Good night (1179) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.

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  (817): I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins. http://tfl.nu/povt
  Replies (8) Good night (2295) Bad night (383) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.

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  (712): Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back. http://tfl.nu/llib
  Replies (11) Good night (318) Bad night (584)
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  (914): View more from New York

  He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.

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  (914): He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him. http://tfl.nu/d8kc
  Replies (4) Good night (1388) Bad night (207) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?

  (1-612): View more from Minnesota

  I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?

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  (612): Did you put pizza in my boxers last night? (1-612): I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day? http://tfl.nu/wnhf
  Replies (0) Good night (219) Bad night (458) Order T-Shirt

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