Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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