it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
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