i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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