Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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