It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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