did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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