A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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