lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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