i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize