I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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