He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
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May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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